SOME HUMOUR FOR A CHANGE OF PACE

It's a quiet day as the temperature drops quickly here in Central Florida. The city's crews have covered all the downtown plants and small trees in preperation for a hard freeze tonight. I thought it would be nice to take a change of pace and bring you some humour, as my daughter forwarded it last night while she was working. I'm sure many of you have probably heard or seen most of these previously, but for those who haven't...enjoy: And keep warm tonight.

ONLY IN AMERICA...

...do drugstores make sick people walk all the way to the back to get their prescriptions, while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

...do people order cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet soda.

...do banks leave both doors open but chain the pens to the counters.

...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: "Poli" in Latin means "many" and "tics" means "bloodsucking creatures".

...do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED...

...why the sun lightens our hair but darkens our skin?

...why women can't put on mascara with their mouths closed?

...why you don't ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

...why "abbreviated" is such is a long word?

...why it is that doctors call what they do "practice"?

...why is lemon juice made with artificial flavour, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

...why is the person who invests your money called a BROKEr?

...why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called "rush hour"?

...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

...if "con" is the opposite of "pro", is Congress the opposite of progress?

...if flying is so safe, then why is the airport building called the terminal?

And you know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff???